The Tiny House

All my financial projections are already in the crapper before I retire. My wife saw a tiny home in Maine about 6 month prior to my retirement and we (she) purchased it. I never had the luxury of seeing the place except in pictures as she went to see it while I was working on the road. I guess I had to trust her vision after 40 years marriage. So all of a sudden I have 2 houses to fix. It wasn’t as if my wife did this without my knowledge, but it was her idea and if things go poorly at least I have someone to blame.

My wife and I were still working when we purchased our tiny house. I traveled weekly for work at that point, so I spent a lot of time in hotels with very little to do but work, eat and sleep. At least I was good at 2 out of three. The tiny house would become our summer getaway 5-6 month a year when we retired, but only I was retiring this upcoming summer as my wife would not retire until the following year. My wife thought it would be great if I used the house all summer and she could visit for a month. Looking back she made this sound like it was all about me getting away after retirement to relax. It took about 10 months for me to realize she was more than happy to send me off!

Retired or Semi-Retired?

Roaming the countryside for work I saw “Help Wanted” signs plastered in every window, in every business, even in the smallest towns in the rural southeast. Laying in bed at some nondescript hotel in some nondescript town I started thinking how Maine was a major summer tourist destination. If jobs were being handed out in rural America to any ordinary idiot that could fog a mirror, then in Tourist Country Maine they must be starving for qualified help, or like me, unqualified help.

When alone in a hotel with an iPhone curiosity becomes a bad thing. It starts with “what is the weather tomorrow” and ends with “where to find the best porcupine pie in all 50 states.” So laying there I started searching for work in Maine more as a curiosity than actually wanting a job. I have not even retired damn it! Why the hell would I want a job in retirement! But Holy Crap, every place in the State O’ Maine needed help, and lots of it. I guess I felt a sense of duty and obligation to the national economy and pushed forward.

Working for Acadia National Park in retirement sounded like fun. There must be something in my bag of job tricks I could perform for Uncle Sam. I did find a lot of job listings, but they all required you to do work. Physical work nonetheless. Clicking on one of the ads which appeared least challenging was an application as tall as Acadia’s Cadillac Mountain. Reading the application started putting me to sleep. When I mercifully came to my senses I realized this had the look and feel of a real job. I moved on.

How about a retirement job that involves drinking? Or at least could involve drinking when nobody is watching. A job in a wine shop popped up, now I am getting someplace. Then, like a vision from above, there it was: “Wine Steward” Pouring wine for tourists at a winery. I know what wine tastes like. I can open a wine bottle. I’ve poured a lot of wine for myself and others. I am drinking wine right now. I am more than qualified!

Clicking buttons and answering questions I sent my application off… twice. As mentioned, I was drinking so no additional explanation is needed. This job could keep me busy while living alone in Maine in between hiking and whatever else occupied my time. During the Zoom interview, my natural charm and wit shone through, or possibly the interviewers had a few too many drinks also. Nonetheless, I was offered the position as Wine Steward 4 days a week including free wine!

For someone that started retirement without a plan, all of a sudden I am busy. I have a 5 month trip to Maine, a new job and a new tiny house. No plan is suddenly getting busy!