Are you Retired? Want to Retire? Bored in Retirement? It’s incredible to think how quickly my first 2 years of retirement flew by! This is a story about my first 2 Years of Retirement, and of course portrayed Grumpy Retiree Style.

You don’t know exactly what to expect during retirement. Things never seem to follow your plans, no matter how well thought out they were. Life has a way of getting in the way of living. Even if you are already deep into retirement, still continue reading. What else do you have to do?

Any help with retirement this article provides is purely accidental!

The Grumpy Retiree

Heading Into Retirement The Grumpy Way

As some of you are aware, retirement kicked off with an exciting development. My biggest change? Buying our tiny house and spending summers in Maine opened up a whole new chapter in my retirement. This decision, my wife thrust upon me just before I stepped into retirement, was the start of an extraordinary twist that was not part of my original plan. There wasn’t enough capacity in my brain to understand the impact of spending 6 months annually in Maine.

The next challenge my first year of retirement was crash testing my financial plan. Would it stand the test of time? My biggest concern financially is missing a meal, a bottle of wine or travel. I didn’t want retirement to mean sacrifices in our lifestyle. You can read more about my thoughts before I retired over at The Grumpy Retiree.

Adjustment: My First 2 Months of Retirement

I was hoping to ease into retirement, but in reality I only had a 2 month adjustment period as I readied for Maine. Soon enough I was on the road to Maine for 6 months living at the tiny house and starting my new part time winery job. There were a lot of loose ends and planing during the 2 months leading to my trip to Maine, so I did not have much downtime or time to think about retirement.

In addition to planning the trip to Maine, I honestly can’t remember doing anything exciting. The funny thing about memories in general is they fade into the rear view mirror much faster than we think. I love it when people say they want to create memories. Memories are strange on how they settle into your head. Your brain picks what you remember in 30 or more years and it usually isn’t the things you expect. Pick a year, any year. How about 1993? No clue what I did or where I was. The only way I remember is using yardsticks like where I worked and my daughters age or grade. And that usually clears up … nothing!

My Biggest Adjustment: Finances

The one thing I did obsess over was finances. Adjusting to no paycheck takes time and I had a lot more time now to think about living in squalor! I always felt we had good financial footing, but real life verses theoretical plans don’t always line up as expected. Ignoring your finances before retirement is a recipe for nasty surprises. The intricacies of Taxes & Social Security (especially for married couples), the Medicare nightmare of deductibles and Plans coupled with depositing your last paycheck was frequently on my mind. But to my surprise everything is working as planned and after each passing month I became less preoccupied with finances.

I cannot stress enough the need to understand if your finances lend themselves to your retirement lifestyle. To me this is the most important piece of the retirement puzzle. Money isn’t everything, but no money is nothing. Good finances becomes your retirement foundation. Travel, dining, hobbies all take money. If sitting at home festering is your dream retirement, you can probably ignore this step.

Fine Tune: Two Things That Changed Right Away!

There were two big changes I noticed after I retired. Losing the work week meant keeping track of the days and dates became a little more challenging. Was it Friday or Saturday? Most of the time didn’t know or care. Weekend? What’s a Weekend? Every day, or 2 days, or 7 days, were a weekend now. That is something I really enjoy. I don’t wait until Saturday to go out to dinner and wait in line with the hordes of working stiffs for my table to become available. Tuesday Senior Discount lunch; No lines, No waiting and a half priced bottle of wine is fine by me. I am officially in the High Pants Boomer Club.

Second, the biggest surprise was how quickly I completely forgot about WORK! This was an absolute total shock. I actually remember thinking to myself how distant a memory work had become within the first 2-3 months. Honestly I could not even remember how to do the old job I performed for 16 years. Maybe it is dementia settling in, but the details were drifting fast and I didn’t care why! Every person is going to fare differently here, but as a Field Service Engineer, flying & driving, hotels & restaurants and a different job site were the norm. I really didn’t miss anyone at work maybe because I didn’t work with anyone. Or maybe because I simply couldn’t make a friend to save my life, but it mattered little. Work is over and I’m over work!

Mainely Settling into Retirement

With work out of my mind and a few months retirement under my belt it was time for … A New Job! Working in retirement at a winery in Maine can hardly be called work, but someone has to do it so why not me? While my wife toiled for my support in NC, working a few days part time kept me busy while we were apart. The winery job may actually be the best “job” I’ve ever had! Returning to the workplace may not be for everyone, but there is no harm working if it’s something you want to do. Of course if in 5 months you’ve depleted 50% of your retirement savings you may not have a choice. But that’s your damn problem and your own stupid fault.

As a bonus, nearby Acadia National Park quickly became my personal 49,000 acre retirement playground. Only problem was sharing it with 3 million damn tourists. Give or take a few. While I am not a Mainer, in my opinion living and working in Maine gave me at minimal a few more residential rights. And complaining about crowds and tourist was first and foremost and I embraced that sentiment with gusto. I am also world renowned at complaining, so this was a perfect additional retirement activity.

Truth be told I went from very casual hiker to avid hiker quickly thanks to Acadia National Park. I explored every trail the park could toss my way and a few trails no longer on maps. I always liked hiking, but never had the time to hike on a regular basis. Thanks to retirement you have the opportunity to explore new adventures that sat on the back burner way too long. Finding something you can embrace and enjoy is key to a successful retirement. Hiking worked for me.

Between working, drinking and hiking and cleaning the house on a semi annual basis, which meant once, I kept very busy.

Return to Real Life: Daily Routine

Back to the semi-real world. Even though I was working and living in Maine, somehow it always seemed like a vacation. People seek out tourist destinations for a reason, there is something to do and see there around every twist and turn. And the bold coastline and natural beauty of Maine, with it’s lighthouses and mountains and small fishing villages, lives up to its billing as Vacationland.

Returning to North Carolina was a bit more difficult. What is called “hiking” near Raleigh I call walking, and it didn’t compare with the rocky coast of Maine and rugged boulder scrambles and trails of Acadia. North Carolina’s mountains are far removed from where I live, so I had hiking withdrawal symptoms almost immediately. I needed to replace all the time hiking and working at the winery with something else to occupy my days. I missed Maine quite quickly.

If you don’t find something to do in retirement you migrate to doing nothing. I had days like that back in North Carolina. Eat, nap, wake up, drink, nap, repeat. Truthfully, I decided I didn’t want to lose all the hard work getting my grumpy hairy legs into hiking form. So I headed to the gym about 5 days a week. I’m getting older and uglier as I age and while ugly is built in, I may as well fight the clock on old. Exercise in some form may not turn the clock back, but it potentially slows the forward motion.

Return to Real Life: Staying out of Trouble

The gym was good for several hours a week, but there are 144 hours in a week in retirement and at my age I sleep about 35 of those hours. That leaves a good 100 hours a week for getting into and out of trouble. I needed to cut that down a bit or I would end up in jail withing a month.

The odd thing about accumulating crap over a lifetime is you end up with … a lot of crap. There is a whole bunch of advertisers that are out to sell you stuff and at younger ages you are weak. Now before I buy anything it has to have some very serious purpose. Underwear? Nope. One semi good pair is fine. I decided that downsizing and getting rid of stuff would be a worthwhile endeavor in retirement. It served the dual purpose of keeping busy and downsizing. Every time I got rid of something I felt great!

In between selling junk and working out at the gym I was planning retirement travel. I spend a lot of time researching trips. From what to see and do to the logistics of trains & planes, I can spend many hours a day doing this. I now have the time and enjoy travel planning and I love customizing our travel. I planned a great trip to Italy & Greece which kept me off the streets to the pleasure of the neighbors. Next up Vietnam, Taiwan and Singapore.

Retirement Times Two

I jumped into retirement alone for the first year as my wife still worked and supported my good, and mostly bad, habits. I had no problem with that impeccable plan right up to the point she disturbed my perfectly good retirement with … her retirement.

While my wife was working it was easy to hide your days’ activities. When she asked what I did, I didn’t admit to bourbon at 11AM and a 2PM nap. You explain how you had to fine tune the exhaust note or Pack the Bearings on the 61 Chevy which is code for actually doing nothing. Scatter a bunch of old parts over the bench and floor and you can easily cover your tracks for a week or two. Why else on earth would I save all those old parts? A plan that takes 40+ years of thought to unfold is either that of a sick genius or a deranged madman. Either way you can’t fault someone for thinking ahead.

Retirement Times Two: Game Over

Once my wife retired it was game over. I had to actually do something. Luckily I had that trip to Europe planned for March & April which was just over 30 days after my wife’s retirement. I was more than happy when my wife went off clothes shopping for the trip. If I didn’t have those bearings to pack I would have joined her. Regardless, between the trip and preparing for Maine on our return home, we were actually quite busy. Dodged that bullet … for now.

Also, you better be prepared to see a lot of each other in Retirement. Like they say: For Better or Worse. My wife also got a job at the winery in Maine so we spent a lot of time together. Of course I was her senior having a year experience under my belt. We had a lot of good fun in Maine, hiking and pouring wine for tourists. Telling them what to see … and more importantly where to go. Summer for us in Maine makes it easy to stay busy and be entertained in retirement.

Retirement Times Two: Back “Home”

Returning back home to North Carolina was another story. I got my wife indoctrinated into the gym routine and the crap reduction program (CRP). And both those activities are still going strong and well. But sooner or later we won’t have anything left to get rid of and will be living in an empty house. At least we will be buff as all hell with all that exercise!

“You must be prepared for unexpected changes in retirement for a variety of unexpected reasons.”

The Grumpy Retiree

I decided to sell my 1961 Chevrolet Impala. I had this vehicle for 45 1/2 years and expected it to become a cornerstone of retirement. Surprisingly it was not a difficult decision. You must be prepared for unexpected changes in retirement for a variety of unexpected reasons. With the tiny house in Maine and travelling overseas I was not using the car as much as it deserved. Also, working on the Impala was not something I desired to do after almost half a century of, that’s right … Packing the Bearings. It was time for someone else to enjoy the vehicle and I don’t regret the decision.

Retirement: Spice It Up!

The Raleigh NC area is nice enough, but in our spare time we got to thinking about better replicating the adventure we have in Maine somewhere for the “other” 6 months a year. One thing you have in retirement is time and lots of it, so we had plenty of time to “what -if we lived ___________”. We played that game a lot. There was Italy, from Sicily to Salerno. Maine year round was in the running. Mexico entered the discussion along with Charleston, SC and a few other places.

We have not made a final decision about relocating, but we are exploring options. You have to make the most of these damn years before you pass the expiration date like a carton of milk.

Retirement: The Little Things

There were a lot of little things in my first 2 years of retirement that either changed or I just notice more now that I have time to pay attention. Is it possible we eat more in retirement? It seems like we are grocery shopping all the time and washing a crapload of dishes! Coffee in the afternoon, yes of course if it includes a snack which equals dishes. Wine at noon, yup = 2 wine glasses. Sure we have a dishwasher, but it is going day and night like a 24 hour diner!

Procrastination. Is there such a thing as crastination? Seems as if there should be. Regardless, it is easy to put things off in retirement as you can always do it tomorrow. And I don’t mean putting off a meal or a drink, only work and chores get put off. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve run out, attired only in a robe and slippers, rolling out the trash bin to the curb when I hear the trash truck approaching. Makes it more exciting and presents an interesting picture for the neighbors and the truck driver. I always get a wave, though I am unsure how to interpret that.

Crastination [ kras-tuh-ney-shuhn] def; putting things off, getting nothing done in a timely manner.
Procrastination [ pruh·kras-tuh-ney-shuhn] def; A Professional at Crastination, (see above).

The Grumpy Retiree

This blog. I took the time and effort to start this blog and I enjoy doing it, but sometimes it falls into pruh·kras-tuh-ney-shuhn. I have nobody to blame except myself and plan on working a bit harder on the blog, including more travel information as we explore different places.

Retirement: The Verdict

Looking back on my first 2 years of retirement, I was a bit surprised that something did not implode! There definitely were some unexpected changes. Maine, getting a “job” and selling the Impala were some of the biggest changes. The potential of moving is now on the horizon, another completely unanticipated lifestyle development.

However a lot of what I expected in retirement did work out as anticipated. The freedom to travel when we want and for extended periods of time is working out very well. At our community we can now partake in events that happen during the weekday. We can work out when we want and lounge with coffee in the afternoon with a tasty treat. Now, when I hear the word snack or treat, I completely understand the dog’s excitement.

I’ve learned that retirement is not stagnant. Nor should it be! Life goes on like it did before, except for that pesky timeclock which I don’t miss! You just have to prepare to adapt, rethink and take advantage of the free time now afforded.